ThinkGeek Canned Unicorn Meat

There's unicorn magic in every bite!

Unicorns are majestic creatures of legend that are said to possess unimaginable powers. It is known that consuming their meat will grant you supernatural abilities, Hence the need for this one of a kind non-cruelty free product. Alright for-reals, the Canned Unicorn Meat is a novelty product from ThinkGeek. Inside the 4oz. tin can is a 6-piece disjointed white stuffed plush unicorn toy that can be accessed from the bottom. It’s cleverly packed showcasing the fake meat product, story of how unicorns are harvested and a cut diagram on the back. True to its claim, it provides smiles and giggles.
$11 – $15
www.thinkgeek.com
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It’s a unicorn in a can

The notorious new food product from Radiant Farms is exactly what it says on the label – a can of meat from a unicorn. Providing “magic in every bite”, it features only the best bits of a carefully farmed plush unicorn stuffed into fourteen ounces of metal. It is probably best not to think too much about how they might have gotten the meat from the unicorn and crammed it in there, or you will make every little girl in the world cry.

A tin of delicious sparkly meat combined with a fascinating adventure into the weird and different. All the best, juiciest and meatiest bits of a unicorn, ground up and served up in its own juices and plenty of sparkles for your taste buds to enjoy!

Awesome product features

  • Great on sandwiches: Think of this product like a replacement for tinned tuna in your life. Whenever you want your tuna sandwich or salad to be a little more special and sparkly, reach for the can of unicorn meat. It goes great with a bit of mayonnaise too.

  • Guaranteed to boost male virility: Unicorns are known all over the world for their ability to pump up a male’s vitality and virility. Eating your unicorn from the can means you don’t have to deal with finding a unicorn yourself, or the mess of butchering it, but can get straight to the good bits.

  • Fun for kids at heart: Everyone knows that all little kids love unicorns. So what kid wouldn’t want to have a taste of their favorite mythical animal? This tin of sparkly fun will make all mealtimes for children extra fun, as they enjoy the glittery awesomeness that is this meat.

Who will appreciate this as a gift

If you are thinking about wrapping this one up, you will want to choose carefully and make sure you know the recipient pretty well. However, fortunately, this is one meat product that almost everyone will love to receive. Who doesn’t need more enchantment in their life?

But it will be the special pop culture nerd in your life who will love it the most. Man or woman, both will love this fun gag gift, and will definitely want to come back for more!

Because you need to know

Were actual unicorns harmed in the making of this product?

No, they were not. Except for the stuffed one, but that doesn’t have feelings. Enjoy your purchase safe in the knowledge that you have not made any dent in the world population of unicorns.

Is this safe for kids?

This unicorn meat product was specifically canned for ages 16 and up. It’s too much for younger kids since they don’t fully grasp the concept of farmed magical animals.

Further reading:

Scientists Identify Unicorn DNA
Roast unicorn anybody? What they ate in the Middle Ages!

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